Negative Emotions

A... IS FOR ANGER: We all know what anger is. But what makes us angry? What fears, griefs, insecurities past hurts? Understand your anger and you can overcome it. Anger might make you enemies, but enemies don’t make you angry. Your thoughts do. Control them and everything will be cool

B... IS FOR BOREDOM: Bored, restless, anxious, disconnected? The cure is curiosity. So, try something new. Learn to dance. Snowboard. Paint. Sing. Juggle. Ask a child for their advice. Take it. Pretend that today is the last day of your life. Or the first. Turn off the television. Tune in to life

C... IS FOR CRITICISM: Criticism tells you everything you need to know about yourself. So listen carefully. The faults you point out in others are very often your own in disguise. The way you speak about the world is the way the world will speak about you. How can life ever look up if you keep putting everyone down?

D... IS FOR DEPRESSION: If you think you might be depressed, the bravest thing you can do is seek help. The only shame would be to miss out on life. Talk to your doctor. Find a therapist you can trust and relate to. Confide in your friends. Exercise. Eat healthily. Rest. Meditate. Don’t self-medicate. Always remember, this, too, will pass.

E... IS FOR EGO: To truly live, live for others.To serve your best interests, serve someone else. The less it is all about you, the more will come to you. The only thing coming between you and happiness is your ego. Let it go

F... IS FOR FEAR: Fear holds you back. To get over it, get into it. Scared of heights? Jump from a plane. Scared of spiders? Pick one up. Scared of clowns? Paint your face. It won’t be easy, but life will get easier. And much less frightening

G IS FOR GREED: Too much of a good thing is a bad thing. Values, not valuables, are what define us. Greed may make our bank balance and bellies grow, but it shrinks our soul. Ask yourself how much is enough, and how much is too much? Sometimes the things that are supposed to make us happy don't

H... IS FOR HATE: If you begin to feel hate, stop. It is a lethal emotion. And will take you places you don’t want to go. So make peace with yourself. And make peace with the world. Practice positive mind control. Let go of resentment, envy, hurt and anger. Face down your fears. And don’t feed the fire. It will consume you

I... IS FOR INSECURITY: Insecurity can steal our lives. But it can be overcome. First, ask yourself: who is saying the hurtful things? You’ll discover that the voice inside is your own. So keep telling yourself that you are loving and loveable, worthwhile and wonderful. Soon others will, too

J... IS FOR JEALOUSY: Jealousy kills the love it seeks to protect. It can remind you of who and why you love — but it can bring with it pain, anxiety and heartbreak. To save your relationship, lose your jealousy. This isn’t easy. It takes time and effort. Truthfulness and trust. Patience and perseverance. Reality checks and reassurance. It’s a labour of love. Jealousy is a snake: cut off its head

K... IS FOR KARMA: Karma is Sanskrit for ‘deed’ or ‘act’. It is the law of cause and effect, part of the Buddhist cycle of past, present and future. Whether your karma is good or bad depends on your intentions. Act with a pure heart and your karma will be kinder

L... IS FOR LIAR: Lies never lie still. They toss and turn inside us, trying to escape, tearing us away from our own deepest truth. If you lie, ask yourself: ‘Why?’ Lies often cover our deepest fears of being discovered, found out, unmasked; of being seen for who we really are. To be all you can be, tell the truth. It might hurt at first to admit it, but it will truly set you free

M... IS FOR MOOD: Many things can cause moods to swing. Drink. Drugs. Diet. Stress. To find balance, go back to basics. Sleep well, eat healthily, exercise. And choose your thoughts carefully. Where your thoughts go, your moods will follow

N... IS FOR NEGATIVITY: Life looks the way you look at it. A negative perspective paints a bleaker universe. Always remember that your outlook will be your outcome. A few small changes can make a huge difference. For instance, try saying ‘Yes’ to every question (within reason). You’ll discover new places, meet new people and live a happier and richer life

O... IS FOR OVERWHELMED: When things get on top of you, it’s time to get on top of things. Stop for a moment. Make a list. Identify your priorities. Prioritise your priorities. Be realistic about what is achievable. Estimate the time it will take. Double it. Then start at the top of the list and work your way down. Do one thing at a time

P... IS FOR PERFECTIONISM: Perfection is a kind of paralysis. The tighter you hold on to something, the more it will hold you back. Often the best way to improve something is to let it go. So do the best that you possibly can, finish it and relax. It will be better than you think. It might even be perfect

Q... IS FOR QUIT: To give up is to give in to the voice that says: ‘It doesn’t matter.’ It does. You know it does. Sometimes, the only thing we have to beat is our desire to give up. Overcome this and you can overcome anything. Never give up on your dreams. Never give up on you. Never give up. Never. Ever

R... IS FOR REGRET: Stuff happens. But it doesn’t need to keep happening. Regret keeps us living in the past, dragging us backwards, holding us back. To get over it, get into the moment. Empty your mind, let go of your thoughts, just be. Be forgiving. Be loving. Be grateful. Let the past be past

S... IS FOR STRESS: Insomnia. Heartache. Anxiety. Depression. The cost of stress is never worth the salary that demands it. When designing your work life, make sure that your life works. Remember the importance of relaxation. Exercise, meditation and moderation all release the tension. Drink, drugs and junk food don’t. So unwind your mind. A little stress is healthy; too much can kill you. Deal with it before you snap

T IS FOR TEMPTATION: Temptation has a habit of growing on you...

U... IS FOR UNCERTAINTY: One thing is certain in life — nothing is certain. The best way to deal with uncertainty is one step at a time. You can never know which way things will fall. But if your life is in balance, you will land on your feet

V... IS FOR VICTIMHOOD: We can’t control what happens in life, but we can control the way we respond. This means eliminating self-pity, blame and victimhood. Bad things happen to good people - but being the victim steals your future

W... IS FOR WORRY: Worry is your brain in too much of a hurry. To get on top of it, get over yourself. Your thoughts are not facts and not fixed. Like clouds, they will pass. Let them go. Let them be

X... IS FOR XENOPHOBIA: Xenophobia is an ugly word. Xeno means foreigner. Phobia means fear. Together they mean racism, biogtry, intolerance, injustice. Yet, if we embrace the differences in this world, the world looks different. More interesting, more rewarding

Y... IS FOR YOU: We all have our downside, our shadow side. Embrace it. Admitting our weaknesses is the first step in regaining our strength. Shining light on our darkness is the beginning of enlightenment

Z... IS FOR ZEN: Zen is a state of being. Of silence. Peacefulness. Mindfulness. Balance your being and your life will be in balance. Live right and everything will be in balance. Sit in stillness and silence. Turn your eye inward

Buy the book....

Positive Emotions

A brilliant new book by the acclaimed illustrator Matthew Johnstone and his lifelong friend James Kerr charts the A to Z of human emotions. Yesterday, they chronicled the emotions that ruin lives. Today, they present the ways to make your spirits soar.

A... IS FOR ADVENTURE: Adventure is the opposite of television.

B... IS FOR BALANCE: As humans we understand things as opposites: Yin and Yang, good and bad, up and down, day and night. Balance is the tension between opposites: rest and activity, conversation and silence, sociability and solitude, love for another and love for oneself. Every moment your life is in the balance. Weigh your options.

C... IS FOR COMPASSION: Compassion means to live with love. It means caring for the sick — and the healthy, too. It means being kind to the needy — and those who need for nothing. Compassion is an equal opportunity emotion. To make others happy, treat them with compassion. To make yourself happy, treat others with compassion.

D... IS FOR DARING: Daring is doing. It gets things done. Every great achievement begins with it. Every great person first dared to be great.What will you dare to do today?

E... IS FOR ENTHUSIASM: For enthusiasts, life is an adventure playground, a theatre, a movie-set, a laboratory, a love story, a test track, a roller-coaster, a dance, a gift, a blessing, a blast, a thrill . . . Let enthusiasm lift you higher. Wherever it takes you, it will be the right place.

F... IS FOR FRIENDSHIP: Friendship is cheaper than therapy, often deeper. Feed your friendships and they will sustain you. Love your friends and you will be loved. Watch their backs and they will watch yours. If life’s a game, your friends are your team. Choose them carefully.

G IS FOR GRATITUDE: Gratitude grows wherever it is planted. Gratitude is more than saying thank you for dinner, it’s saying thank you to life. When you give thanks, thanks gives back. So be grateful for what you have, and you’ll have everything you need. The first sign of greatness is gratitude.

H... IS FOR HOPE: There is one thing sure in life: this too will pass. No matter your situation, it is certain to change. However dire things may seem, there is always a new day, a new way. Hope helps. Like a rope, it can pull you out of a hole.

I... IS FOR IMAGINATION: Imagine what's possible, then make it happen. A cake isn't a cake until it's cooked.

J... IS FOR JOY: Happiness is found deep within. It comes from our soul — not from external things. So look inside and feel the joy. Soon those around you will feel it, too.

K... IS FOR KNOWLEDGE: Pass it on.

L... IS FOR LOVE: In life, we lose our youth, our strength, our influence, our memory, even our bladder control. In the end, all we have, and all we will be remembered for, is the love that we give; not just to one person, but to everyone we meet. Remember this — and you will be remembered. What is there to say about love that has not been said before, except I love you. Love is a four-letter word. Swear by it.

M... IS FOR MEDITATION: Meditation is a form of medication. When your soul aches, take a moment. The more you get into meditation, the more you get out of it. So be mindful - sit in stillness and silence, watch those thoughts, empty your mind - and live a full and conscious life. Because now is where it's at. Learn to listen and very soon the truth will whisper in your ear.

N... IS FOR NOW: It really is now or never. Life is fleeting. Miss the moment and it’s gone for ever. To make the most of life, make the most of every moment. Forget the past, ignore the future, be present to the present. Look around. Where are you? How do you feel? Notice your breathing. The sounds all around you. Your thoughts as they pass. What can you see that you’ve never seen before? It doesn’t matter where you’ve been. It doesn’t matter where you’re going. It only matters where you’re at.

O... IS FOR OPTIMISM: Optimism put man on the Moon and food on the table. Optimism looks for the best in every situation. The upside of every downside. The yes in every no. Cultivate it. Optimism will bring you friendship and success, health and wealth, love and laughter. It's that kind of word.

P... IS FOR PASSION: Passion has the power to transform your life — to reveal your purpose, your reason for being, your life’s work. To find out what your passion is, ask yourself: ‘What would I do if money was no object?’ Paint? Write? Teach? Dance? Open a vineyard, start a charity, even found a bank? The trick is to think big, then begin by taking small, steady steps towards your dream. Mark Twain said: ‘The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.’ What would you do if you could do anything at all? Passion makes anything possible.

Q... IS FOR QUIET

R... IS FOR RECONCILIATION: You cannot undo the past. But you can change the future. To reconnect with someone, first forgive yourself. You’re human, you mess up. Then forgive the other person. They’re human, too. If you do mess up, confess and apologise. Saying sorry goes a long way. Meaning it goes even further. Remember: the sooner you can laugh about it, the sooner you can laugh about it together.

S... IS FOR SMILE: Unleash the power of a smile. Smile at strangers. Smile at trees. Smile at misfortune. Smile at yourself in the mirror in the morning. Smile just for the sake of it. Soon fortune will smile back at you.

T... IS FOR TRUST: Trust is the bedrock of love, the mattress of marriage, the cradle of childhood, the foundation of friendship. Trust in the truth and, the truth is, you’ll be trusted.

U... IS FOR UNIVERSE: When things are looking down, look up. Sometimes realising our cosmic insignificance can put our troubles in perspective. Have faith, trust in Fate, be free. The Universe is there to support you. Climb on board.

V... IS FOR VISION: To understand what your vision is, ask the Big Questions. What am I? What are my values? What do I want to teach, to pass on? These are the beginnings of a vision. One day you will ask yourself: ‘What kind of life have I lived?’ What will your answer be?

W... IS FOR WISDOM: Knowing isn’t wisdom. Knowing yourself is.
There is more wisdom in contentment — accepting life and everything in it — than is contained in all the libraries in the world. Your soul is a book — study it carefully. Share what you’ve learned. If you go out looking for wisdom, it won’t know where to find you.

X... IS FOR A KISS: A kiss shows love and intimacy, tenderness and desire. It can say hello or goodbye, good luck or good riddance, adoration or adulation. It can say things that can otherwise never be said, communicating without sound. What will you say with a kiss today? And who will you say it to?

Y... IS FOR YOU: To live a full and satisfying life, think with your heart, be loyal to your dreams, engage your emotions, respect your relationships, defy your fears, pursue your passions, find your flow, express your energy, enjoy the moment, contribute to your community, feed your mind, your body and your soul, leave a legacy and live with love. Be happy. Be honest. Be hopeful. Be yourself.

Z... IS FOR ZEN (AGAIN): You may recognise zen from yesterday’s Alphabet of Toxic Emotions. That’s because it is where the negative and the positive meet. It’s a neutral state of being. Of silence. Peacefulness. Wakefulness. Mindfulness. Balance your being and your life will be in balance. Live right and everything will be in balance. Sit in stillness and silence. Turn your eye inward.

Buy the book....